The longer I practice meditation, the more I ask myself why I do it.
When I first began, I thought of it as, “oh, another tool and habit to incorporate to benefit my life, let’s do it!” Fair enough. But while I knew it would benefit me in general, I didn’t specifically define my aims and goals. Two years ago, when I came across an article suggesting that the why is more important than the habit itself, I began to tally my reasons. Here’s the result:
I meditate to connect, check in, and center myself to start my day. If my mind is the camera that perceives the world throughout the day, meditation provides a sturdy tripod resting on even ground.
I meditate to build the mind’s muscle that chooses response. The act of noticing thoughts, and then choosing to return to the breathe, is developing a skill like any other. Then, when the line at the grocery store is eight people deep, when an outside event perturbs me in some way, I possess the habit and space to return to my breathe, from which I can choose my wisest response.
I meditate to develop my ability to notice facts of reality. You don’t need to establish a thought-free head to successfully meditate, you just need to notice those thoughts. I observe the mind, breathe, sounds, smells, emotions, sensations in my body. The traffic is going by and I seek to watch from the side of the road. This practice has even translated indirectly to my conducting: I notice the horns playing softer than the bassoons, I notice the oboes are slightly sharp, I notice the violin bow move closer and closer to its tip. This mindfulness facilitates creativity, playfulness, and spontaneity.
I meditate to develop self-acceptance. One common challenge is becoming frustrated or annoyed with the facts. Man, I notice I have a sore-throat this morning…why did I eat so much sugar last night?! These judgments from Inner Critics are commonplace, but when I begin to accept what is and respect reality, self-empathy and self-compassion can blossom, and a process of ‘guiltless mistake correcting’ can begin.
JB
